Have you ever started on a project and halfway into it you lost interest? Or you were convinced that because you were talented in a certain area that you would be a perfect fit for developing a business around it? Or maybe you signed up to volunteer to help someone out only to find that you absolutely were NOT the woman or man for the job?
Do you feel completely at home in some situations, but totally ill at ease in others? It happens a lot. Why? Because we tend to consider only the question, What Do I Want?…and totally leave out “How Do I Use My Creativity and Channel My Mental Energy to Act and Do?” – taken from the book Conative Connection, Acting on Instincts by Kathy Kolbe.
When I was introduced to this book and Kathy Kolbe’s program and took the assessments, it was a life changer for me! It totally blew my mind! I had never given it a thought as to how I naturally handled everyday situations, projects, relationships or life in general. I’d never asked myself, What is my natural MO or mode of operation? (I mean…it’s not something that’s usually on our radar!)
When the results came in, I was so excited AND relieved to discover those things that I naturally resort to in any given situation!! I mean, with years of swimming upstream against my natural instincts, thinking I was somehow flawed, it was supremely exciting and freeing to finally know why I shy away from some tasks, relationships or situations and why I am drawn to others!
In her book, Kathy Kolbe says: “You won’t accomplish much if you strive against your instincts, forcing action contrary to your natural impulse, but you’ll end up exerting just as much or more energy in the effort. Since mental energy is a limited resource, your conative talent can be frittered away as you pile up work you’ll never tackle, design systems to which you’ll never adhere, and gather data you’ll never read.”
WHOA!!! So all this time I was setting myself up for things that my natural instinct was saying, “No way I’m doing that!” Which would then kick in my inner critic to proceed to tell me how much of a failure I was, that I most certainly couldn’t quit now, to beat me up with thoughts such as I never finish anything, I can’t be trusted and that I pretty much suck! Does any of this sound familiar?
There is a reason we do what we do! All of us have strengths in many different areas. Some of us are good at seeing the big picture but to ask us to take on the minute details of keeping the program running smoothly on a daily basis would just send us over the edge!
Some people are wired to take care of the details but asking them to envision and create a program that will change lives, to implement it, see the vision and just know how it will make the world a better place in the future…their eyes would roll back in their heads! Honoring our individual personal, natural instincts makes everything we do so much easier!
When you know your specific “mode of operation”…you won’t ask of yourself to do the things that drive you insane. You would question whether you need to do it at all or delegate it to someone who would love to do it! Instead of beating yourself up for getting upset with someone, a situation or even hating your own life, you can change what you do and let go of the things that you are not naturally wired for.
If you have been struggling for years in any of the following areas:
- always ending up in the wrong relationship
- working at a job that you hate
- getting yourself into projects at home that you dread and you don’t want to finish
- taking on more responsibility than you are comfortable with
- performing certain daily tasks that you seem to put to the back burner and never visit again (but they are still in the back of your mind that you need to do!)
- (Insert yours here…)
May I suggest that you give this assessment a try? Find out what your personal natural instincts are and start “Building the Life that you’ve Always Wanted”! Do what you love to do and do well and ditch the rest! Know your limits! I can tell you, the freedom you are so desperately looking for is very close at hand when you begin to honor your instincts! It’s so worth it!
For more information about the Kolbe Assessment Click the Link Below:
(I am an affiliate of Kobe.com because I absolutely love what it has done for me! I think you will too!)
If you have more questions, feel free to comment below! Join me on facebook! I’ll be hanging out there!