In several conversations with others recently, I was catapulted back to a time when I was struggling unsuccessfully with what we call “having the need to please”.
This debilitating trait, as you may know, comes with a wide open door for any manipulator to easily draw one “the pleaser” in like a magnet.
While I am much more able to avert going into pleasing mode these days, (thank God) when I’m caught off-guard, I will search my brain frantically again for a good way to respond to the situation.
Why am I telling you all this?
More importantly…why is Miss Mia dressed like Cinderella?
This time, inspiration took my thoughts to the 2015 Disney movie, Cinderella. This version was filled with beautiful life lessons specifically for those who are “people pleasers”.
The main theme of the movie, is a heartfelt message by Cinderella’s mother to her daughter, knowing she would not be able to be there for her soon…
“have courage and be kind”
There is a scene in the movie where Cinderella shares her own perspective as she deals with the difficult people in her life.
She was riding her horse in the forest and accidentally encounters an unknown hunter (who really was the Prince) chasing a stag on his horse.
The conversation started with Cinderella condemning the hunter for chasing the stag who hadn’t done anything to him.
Once sure the stag was safely out of harms way, they continued their conversation with light introductions.
The scene goes like this:
Prince: Miss, what do they call you?
Cinderella: Never mind what they call me.
Prince: You shouldn’t be this deep in the forest alone.
Cinderella: I’m not alone, I’m with you. Mister, what do they call you?
Prince: (hearty laughter) You don’t know who I am? that is…they call me Kit. Well my father does, when he’s in a good mood.
Cinderella: Where do you live Mister Kit?
Prince: At the palace….my father’s teaching me his trade.
Cinderella: You’re an apprentice!
Prince: Of a sort.
Cinderella: That’s very fine. Do they…do they treat you well?
Prince: Better than I deserve most likely. And you?
Cinderella: They treat me as well as they are able.
Prince: I’m sorry.
Cinderella: It’s not your doing.
Prince: Nor yours either I’ll bet.
Cinderella: It’s not so very bad. Others…others have it worse I’m sure. We must…simply have courage and be kind, mus-int we?
Prince: Yes, you’re right. That’s exactly how I feel.
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“they treat me as well as they are able”
…is a good reminder that we are all capable of hurting
another based on how we have been treated.
At the end of the movie, Cinderella was leaving her home to begin her life with the Prince. Her step-mother, was seated on the stairs as Cinderella approached the door to leave. She stopped, turned to her step-mother and said simply,
“I forgive you”
She knew that unless she could forgive, the hurt would follow her the rest of her days, thus casting a dark shadow on her beautiful life with the Prince.
Forgiveness gives one permission to let go of the hurt and never think of it again.
When you do, the burden is lifted and love shines through once more.